Turtle or Tiger Quiz
Based on Imago Relationship Theory by Harville Hendrix, PhD, and Minimizing and Maximizing energy, developed by Joyce Buckner, PhD.
Answer each of the 8 questions below. Choose the answer that makes sense to you. For the best results, pick the answer that matches what you do first. Each answer has a Point Value (1 or 2). Add your points and compare them to the scale at the bottom of the page.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Feel tight inside and not express my emotions.
(2) Express my feelings with a lot of energy.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Adopt an “I’ll take care of myself, I don’t need anyone” attitude.
(2) Turn to others and talk to them about what I am going through.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Not be able to tell my partner why I’m upset.
(2) Tell my partner all about my upset.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Have very few needs.
(2) Be very open with my feelings and believe I need others around me.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Exclude others from my personal space.
(2) Express my needs and try to get my partner to hear and respond.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Withhold my feelings, thoughts, and behaviors.
(2) Be excessively generous.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Figure things out by myself.
(2) Feel responsible for making the relationship work, and getting my partner to open up and talk.
“WHEN I GET UPSET, I TEND TO…”
(1) Feel safer alone or in situations that are not intense.
(2) Get others’ input about what I should be doing to handle the situation.
Are you more Turtle-Like, or more Tiger-Like, or perhaps both?
POINTS SCALE
Turtle 8……………9……………10……………11…………..12……………13……………14……………15……………16 Tiger
Turtle / Tiger